Neue

Wow. I just saw, for the first time, my shadow.

I used to think that my shadow, my inner side, was the reflection of the evil in me. My hate, anger, greed. But, surprise, I was wrong. It wasn't any of that.

All the hurt, all the pain, the big wounded spot I have, that's my shadow. I deny all of my pain. To be strong, you have to shrug off pain, right? But now, I think it's dawned on me. The pain doesn't really go away. It collects in all the crevices, sharpens the rough edges. I never wanted to say this, but I am damaged. It's what's causing my insanity.

Hmm . . .

I don't think I'll write anything for a while.