The standardized unit of measurement for nakedness is the nude (abbreviated as ñ.) The scale is measured as follows:
0ñ: a winter jacket, snow pants, and an unattractive scarf
0.25ñ: taking your shoes off in someone else's house
2ñ: taking a shirt off in public and your belly kinda flops out for a second
5ñ: wearing a bathing suit
10ñ: plumber's crack
30ñ: wearing one of those paper smocks while sitting in a doctor's office
45ñ: being pantsed in front of a boy/girl you previously thought you had a shot with
100ñ: sharking
3000ñ: naked open casket funeral
Hopefully this has given you a greater understanding how to measure your nudity and that of others.
Monday, April 26, 2010
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